Reconciling a Heartrending Loneliness

“The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved.”

― MOTHER TERESA (1910–1997)

There is far too much loneliness in our world.

Ever more so these days – in this day and age of modern convenience and technology and ease – there is a polarised sense of isolation. And one needn’t be single. So many lonely people are lonely in the busiest of places; in the noisiest of lives; in the ‘sanctity’ of marriage.

Loneliness is a manifestation of soul where the person is bereft of love. We can connect loneliness with a lack of experienced love. We may struggle to connect that we are loved; we may not see it.

First >>> Empathy, Warmth and Compassion

Reconciling a heartrending loneliness can be a challenge for anyone – married, single, divorced, never married, widowed, orphaned, the betrayed...

Anyone can be affected, and anyone can be so overwhelmed in their confusion: “Why, just why, am I so lonely?”

And anyone can be justifiably lonely. Yes, it is not to be selfish, pitiable, or ungodly to be lonely. To be lonely is to be connected to a heart-wrenching reality – a reality that identifies us as human.

Yes, human.

We have a need for connectedness. Of course, when we experience a soul-loneness, that sense of disconnectedness to our humanity seems obvious. We feel cut off from ourselves, because we feel cut off to an essential part of our humanity – the need for connectedness.

We must now connect with this vital truth: it is not selfish, pitiable (read, self-pity), or ungodly to be lonely. We must receive God’s empathy, warmth, and compassion – through these words, if necessary. Indeed, we might see how we are trying to honour God’s will in and through ourselves by being connected – to respond to our sense of soul-loneness.

God is calling our hearts to respond to this sense of aloneness: to search in hope.

Second >>> Moving Forward to Search – In Hope

It is to honour God to respond to his calling in your heart to be connected to your fellow humanity – to desire a partner, to hanker for friendship, to want to be connected to family; to enjoy your work relationships.

God wants us, most of all, to keep seeking – to not give up – but to do so patiently.

The only way we can do these things – to keep seeking, to not give up, but to do so patiently – is to invest in hope. Hope is a positive thing. It holds to ideals and visions and openness. Hope is always a good thing. Hope leads us to God as God leads us to hope.

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Being lonely corresponds to our need for connection – God made us this way. It is not selfish, pitiable, or ungodly to be lonely. It is God’s affirmation that something is missing. God wants us to search in hope – to not give up – to find our need of connection met. Hope will address loneliness. Hope.

© 2013 S. J. Wickham.