To not love another is to hate oneself

Photo by insung yoon on Unsplash

You have heard it said, ‘So whatever you would like others to do to you, do also to them, for this is the law and the prophets.’ Yes, Jesus’ words as recorded in Matthew’s gospel (chapter 7, verse 12).

Very truly there is something worldly significant in these words of Jesus. We ought to know this when He tells us ‘for this is the law and the prophets.’ When we do what He has said for us to do, we truly get the fundamental aim of life right. In this, we overcome our sin. In this, we please God. In this, we achieve the goal that God has set for us. In this, we love one another, which remember, is Jesus’ final command.

And surely it is this:
to love another is to love ourselves, or,
another way of putting it,
to not love another is to hate oneself.

Imagine you work on a hot desk, where the computer you use is used by other people, and the last person who used it has left it in an untidy state. You feel disrespected. The previous person had an opportunity to love you; they declined.

You decide to clean it before using it, and then when you have finished with it, you decide to clean it again for the next person. What you are doing is nothing special, for the business you work for has provided all the hygiene wipes, and they expect you to do the right thing. You are only doing your duty. Yet in choosing to love the next person who will use the computer, you are choosing to love yourself, because it is a blessing to be a blessing.

If you were not to clean the computer, and leave it as it was found, you would resist and reject the blessing you could receive. And in not doing the right thing you would actively resist abiding by your company’s standards, which, if your conscience isn’t stirred, shows your conscience is seared. You don’t even see that in not loving another you refuse to love yourself. You don’t care.

See how it only makes sense to love others, for blessings given are always boomerangs. And this is nothing about what others give us, but it is what God gives us that is truly important. In having given what God had ordained for us to give, we have attained to the perfection of God in that moment.

Nothing more does God ask of us.

One act at a time,
in the will of God,
and His perfection is easy.

Blessings given are always boomerangs.

Surely this can resonate with even the most narcissistic people. And indeed, it does, because it can even be used as a source of manipulation. It causes ‘good’ people to second-guess even the deeds of good people, for we need to know the motive for love is genuinely beyond what a selfish person can get out of it.

Another way of looking at it is it’s only those who are securely attached within themselves, who don’t need to use people, who will interact with others from this base that says, ‘I will love you because I can, and because to love you is not only an opportunity to feel good within me, but it is principally an opportunity to build Someone Else’s kingdom, not my own.’

The fulfilment of the law and the prophets was Jesus’ concern. He calls us, to this end, to the simplicity of doing to others what we would have them do to us. It is the holy standard interaction we call love. It is taking the initiative. It is choosing to go first. And it is acting in faith even if our actions are not reciprocated.

And it is choosing to be joyful
especially when our love is not reciprocated,
for when we get upset
that someone didn’t reciprocate
we prove we did our good deed for ourselves
and not for God.

People can only see the Kingdom in us
when they can see
we are not blessing them for ourselves but for God.

This, in one movement, is the fulfilment of the law and the prophets.

Nothing more need be said, and nothing more need be done.

God is pleased.

God simply desires
that we do for another person
that which is good for us
because it is good for Him.