Sunday, March 22, 2020

2 responses in anxious times – empathy or exploitation

I’m feeling a little angry at present, and I know that’s because of anxiety, which is a response to feeling out of control, because friends are losing jobs, people are losing their lives, and every feeling person is at least a little on edge.
These are times we could have imagined, but somehow only seem fit at the cinemas.
The bizarre thing is those who would dearly love to work are losing their jobs, whilst those who society demands that they work stand to burnout and are at acute risk of infection.
I know people on both sides of the ledger.  For us, none of our work is so vital to the function of society that we’re guaranteed income.  Yet, I’ve got family members and friends who are under pressure to work every minute they’re rostered on.
Then we look at the statistics — particularly deaths.  Much of the time in different jurisdictions we look at that low 1-5% figure, but many of us wonder if we or a loved one or dear friend will end up in that column.
Then there’s the anonymous person who does fit in that column — they died early.
When it comes to life and death, it really doesn’t matter how ‘rare’ the cases are; we still wonder if death may come calling.  And I don’t care if you’re Christian, and you have an eternity with Christ to look forward to, nobody wants to leave their loved ones behind.
Then there are those who are clearly still stuck in their own bubble — I think of people with such heavily vested interest in themselves that that’s all you’ll hear about.  And although it’s a temptation for all of us, it makes me sick at such a time as this.  And yet, particularly at a time as this, we may see them in their true colours.
There are those who are geared to exploit people and there are those who go the opposite way and hand-deliver empathy to everyone’s door — those run off their feet at work and those who’ve just lost their job.
Those who exploit people in this present crisis will always make every conversation about them and watch them twist scenarios to their own advantage when everyone’s looking the other way because of the stress they’re under.  Watch out for the ulterior motive, the sleight of hand.
But there are also those who live to understand others, who seek to know their needs, who connect with the suffering in every individual, and who insist on putting others first.  Those who literally are God in skin.
While some are geared to manipulate,
compassionate others are geared to bless.
The narcissist makes it all about themselves, and yes, they can even make their interest in the other person a manipulation, too.  They do their best conniving work when people think they’re a hero, and because trust is implicit, they get away with murder while everyone’s looking away either too stressed to notice or applauding them.
The empath is blessed in being a blessing but they’re also running the risk of burnout themselves through compassion fatigue.  And naturally they’ll tire of others taking advantage.
It’s discouraging to the maximum when everyone expects you to listen to every bother they have, yet nobody is interested in listening to even one of the many burdens you bear.  This is the true empath’s reality!
Watch for people’s responses to their own anxiety.  Do they recognise it and then are wise enough to care for another and therefore are a means of support, or do they extract every minute’s attention and make it about themselves?
Like in life in general, and just as much now, we can either empathise or exploit.  The empath encourages everyone not to panic, but the narcissist exploits panic.


Photo by Tonik on Unsplash

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