Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Being in the Wrong When You’re in the Right


What’s important about life is not being right. We too easily—all of us—want to be right, when being right is not really the point. Worse, it elevates that which is unimportant over what is truly important: other people.

I must say that marriage has taught me, at the most fundamental of levels, that being considered right even when we’re probably right is not that important. In fact, when it’s dwelt upon, it often leads us down the garden path to that place called ‘self-pity’. This is never a good destination to find ourselves in.

We can’t make things right, i.e. better, from this standpoint. We can only make them worse as we’re twisted into an increasingly contorted emotional mess.

And this is not just about marriage. It’s a feature in all relationships.

It’s Inevitable

As sure as night becomes day and day becomes night again, we’ll all be unjustly treated. If we accept this, and there’s no good not accepting it, then we can plan for those times when we’re going to be transgressed.

It’s a Test

Being considered wrong even when we’re right is a marked character test of our maturity. How do we react when we’re maligned? Often, if we’re honest, we haven’t reacted well at all. We’ve been patently outraged, if not outwardly, certainly from within.

With our higher mind, however, we can see that being right is not that important. There’s a bigger picture we’re missing when we fuse our thoughts onto negative feelings.

The Right Response, Every Time

Doing the right thing in response to the injustices of life is what we are able to do, if we will allow God to train us in these ways so we can become more consistent in it.

The right response will still not happen every time. The aspiration, however, is one we’re striving for; to get more consistent in our guarded-of-response approaches to life.

The right response caters for the other people affected. We never live or operate in a vacuum. Whatever we do and say has impacts on others.

© 2010 S. J. Wickham.

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