When Forgiveness is the Key to Happiness

“When you forgive people they no longer control your happiness.”

— Rick Warren

Hurts abound in life, and there isn’t a single day we are free of them.

We want to forget our hurts and save ourselves pain, but, on the other hand, we cannot quite let go of the issue and the person on the other end of the debacle. Such a situation is problematic, because we waver between two simultaneously-opposed places of the spirit. Wavering never goes before peace. When we waver we give ourselves permission to enter spiritual torment. No one in their right minds can want this.

Forgiving people is a hard thing to do, unless we give the matter of forgiveness over to God; to pray for divine help.

When we receive divine help, we know it! It comes in like a miracle and suddenly the impossibility of forgiveness is taken out of our hands. We are aided by an invisible force—I call it God’s grace. God’s grace can only come from one place. It’s not from us, or anything we can do.

Giving Ourselves Freedom To Obtain Freedom

It’s no blasphemy to say that we have a great deal of control over the circumstances of our forgiving of someone or a situation. Indeed, God puts the ball into our court and requires something of us—surrender—not only the matter itself, but ‘us’ ourselves.

When we can give ourselves the freedom to let go of matters, we give ourselves the gift of knowing freedom. One freedom, an initial investment, provides for even more freedom, which is a lasting gift where peace abides.

We are the ones to give ourselves permission to forgive.

Self-permission must be granted and received before God can get involved, but God, if truth be told, has already instigated the motivation to forgive, amongst other hidden gifts of the Spirit that sponsor and augment our forgiving action.

In this way we can truly see why our actions of surrendered obedience—in this case, to do the inner heart work to forgive—germinate from the size of a mustard seed of faith. Still, God makes it up to us.

The Lord will not give us freedom if we don’t want it.

We must richly desire it, and do our work in order to obtain it. Then, by miracle, it is gifted to us—this grace that facilitates the mental, emotional and spiritual processes needed to deliver such freedom.

***

The grace to forgive is a free gift that only need be accepted. Accepting such a gift is an action that requires some obedience: we have to agree we want it. Who doesn’t want freedom? Let’s work with God to receive it.

We are creators of our own destiny; the destiny preordained by the Creator. Our destiny is to live free. There is only one way to truly do that: accept Jesus as Saviour, Lord, and King.

© 2013 S. J. Wickham.