A stunningly callous spiritual abuse happening right now

Fearful beyond reason for losing control over their congregants, watch for the pastoral leaders who will chastise, rebuke and discipline their people for admitting fear or for appearing fearful.

This kind of control is evidenced in followers of the leader who will themselves chastise, rebuke and discipline people for being fearful.  Abusive leaders often have many mouthpieces.  Indeed, behind every Christian who does this is a denomination, doctrine or figurehead who rules by the iron fist that no believer is to be fearful.

This is absolutely antithetical to the gospel; Jesus knew and accepted that we would battle regularly with fear.  

Let’s look at the signs of this tyrannical form of lordship that gaslights us as being (toxically) ‘fearful’:

·                   attracting their indignation for posting what really concerns you on social media — especially when you express sadness or other ‘negative’ feelings i.e. when you’re being honest, and where, in fact, you are actually reaching out and inviting others to get alongside you.  In such situations, we may actually be saying, “I need some help here.”  Never should anyone be made to feel guilty or ashamed for not feeling strong enough

·                   wherever you hear the person or leader say something to the effect, “You are making us Christians look bad/weak/worldly for your display of ‘not trusting God enough’.”  What these people are motivated by most of all is maintaining the appearance of strength, when faith is anything but the appearance of strength, but it is strength in weakness

·                   situations where someone keeps spruiking, “we got the victory,” and they insist on everyone in the faith being jolly, joyous, happy-clappy and cheerful — I mean, all the time

·                   where you cannot express your grief about either the present situation or other losses you’ve had in your life — loss will swamp our faith and grief is something that insists our faith grow, and this cannot occur without feeling the weight of it.  Denying our grief is always counterproductive and it ultimately stifles our growth in faith

·                   responding to emails or other communications with any sense you’re uncertain of the direction of leadership — it’s a dangerous organisation that cannot cope with your real thoughts

·                   criticism toward you at any sign that you’re not dependent on them for all your guidance — that you’re able to operate autonomously, and even that you’re taking counsel from others spiritually.  This is a revelation of their fear of losing control over you when they might be criticising you for being fearful — indeed, they might say, “Why are you so fearful that you’re going to them?”

·                   when you’ve lost your job and they say, “What are you worried about, the Lord will provide for you... you lack faith, stop being racked with fear”

·                   any lack of compliance to their rebuke — which may be viewed by them as sedition, a sure sign they’re not doing God’s work in your life or the lives of others

God understands that this is a fearful time, just as we’re invited to run to God in response.  We never have to be fearful of our responses before God.

God says, “Do not be afraid” because God knows we will be fearful.

Being fearful is the opportunity to turn, to repent, to return back to faith, but that’s not to say we won’t repeatedly need to follow that process — we will!

It’s neither fair nor is it loving to tell someone off for being fearful.

The opportunity is to encourage, to build up, to restore the person.  But someone who must maintain a grip of control over people will have no interest in encouraging, building up, or assisting people to heal.

These times are fearful times.  The last time we faced anything like this was back in the 1930s and 1940s.  It would be fair to say anyone — with Christian faith or not — has elevated levels of anxiety at present, and it has nothing whatsoever to do with a lack of faith.

Some leaders — though they will not be honest about this when they do it — are morbidly fearful of losing their ministries.  How ironic then when they accuse you of lacking faith.

Honestly, how horrendous is it that when people are shocked and in absolute turmoil right now, they are berated by people who should know better.  Too many times people will accept this reprehensible treatment, accepting it as right, and of all things, think of it as God’s will.

Photo by Taneli Lahtinen on Unsplash