“Trust is not a human emotion but a feeling of
sustained confidence in a person, place, or thing.”
— Gary & Anne Marie Ezzo
When it comes to families,
notwithstanding workplaces, church fellowships and the like, there is nothing
more important to relationships than trust. Trust is the maker or breaker of
the human continuity within the arrangements for love. Where love persists, as
found augmented by trust, just like where there is trust, there is love.
Where trust is betrayed—upon
neglect or abuse—love evaporates as if it never existed in the first place.
Families survive and thrive upon
trust, but they are destroyed without it. And where there is no trust there is
no respect. Where trust flourishes there we find respect, also.
If we are to work on anything when
it comes to families it ought to be trust; the beginning, middle and end of the
fabric of safety woven in love.
We, the Trusted
What an enormous privilege it is,
especially as parents, grandparents, bosses, and anyone with influence
socially, to create and augment the culture of trust; where trust would
flourish and respect flow down like a teeming river of justice as a direct
result.
How do we achieve such outcomes?
Building trusting relationships
has to be about connectedness. There
has to be the motivation deep within to connect to the person who relies upon
us for safety. It is no good at all if, as a parent, we cannot vouchsafe the
child’s security by the extension of our sacrifice to nurture trust.
We must provide space for trust.
Simply, we must trust.
We must be prepared to have our
trust betrayed, and to be big enough not to behave hurt. Our love needs to be
big enough to contain the situations
that God has blessed us with. We are caretakers of God’s love within the
relationships we’ve been placed in. We cannot abuse or neglect such a role if
trust is important to us.
As God is graceful, we, also, are
to be graceful. When people feel safe in our company—especially children, who
must depend—trust is possible. But if people don’t feel safe, for any reason, trust is near-on impossible.
It’s easier not to trust than to trust.
Trust and safety are aligned.
Where safety, the duty to care, is important enough that we provide it, trust
is inevitable.
We, the trusted, must be
trustworthy. We have been trusted with a role and it is incumbent on us to
deliver good on that trust. And we can. There is possibly nothing more alluring
to a human being to either be trusted or to be privileged to trust. When we
have the privilege to trust other people, and we discharge that trust, our
credibility soars, because people feel secure in our presence.
We are blessed for having trusted.
***
Families survive and thrive on
trust, but they are destroyed without it. And where there is no trust there is
no respect. Where trust flourishes there we find respect, also. There, also, we
find love.
© 2013 S. J. Wickham.
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