Keeping your head up when nothing makes sense

Though we’re gaslit by ourselves when we’re in that place, there’s nothing more normal than feeling completely awry.  It’s so normal as a human being to feel as if nothing makes any sense when nothing makes any sense.  When we find ourselves in that circumstance.

When it happens, we may have the vaguest perception that we can fight our way out of it.  The trouble is we have no motive nor purpose nor energy to mount such a recovery.

When situations like this conspire against us, when the circumstances of life erode our confidence, it is easy to find ourselves in a place where our heart has gone AWOL, and our mind simply won’t cogitate.

Whether it is fear or sadness or a combination of both or even some elusive sense that our purpose has disappeared, really matters very little, because we just feel so disempowered.

The greatest paradox is that the moment we need a boost most is the moment we can procure a boost least.  The very time we need to lift our head to the heavens in hope is the very time we struggle to do that seemingly simple thing.

Despair is a pariah.  Many times it comes without any warning.  Enervation is no respecter of persons.  It dashes significant levels of confidence in short, sharp time.  Much of it can be attributed to spiritual attack, as dark and invisible forces thwart a person’s plans.

To have been there once in any significant way is a life experience for the employment of empathy for any who suffer such spiritual poverty.

To have been there is also the knowledge that it can happen again, and when that occurs perhaps there’s the grace we might extend ourselves as we employ space for ourselves—whether it’s time, the removal of pressure, strategic withdrawal, space to divert attention to bird noises and the breeze, a box-breathing routine, etc.

There is something enigmatic about the spiritual attack that offers no clue of both its origin and its correction.  It’s in this space of being that we’re confounded and perplexed.  And until you’ve been there you think it can’t happen.  But again, once you’ve been there the eyes of your conception for challenges previously unknown to life are opened.  

Never considered a badge of honour, the unlocking of these challenges previously unknown opens the door to a realm of suffering that can seem unbelievable and untold.

Never considered a gift, ever!  Never even considered something that’s to be granted to someone despised.  But such levels of pain are to be experienced to be believed.  Even in the midst of it there’s the conception of possibility—if there’s a way into this, there must be a way out.  But first there must be the poise to sit in it to pick up on the cadence of such an environment.

Keeping our head up when nothing makes sense is something that can only be learned when we’re there—when nothing makes sense.  Nothing else can prepare us for such a place of being.

Enduring those places of being where nothing makes sense is a deeper spirituality, not extended to the fainthearted.  Keeping your head up in the temerity of it is something that can only be learned when you’re there.

Don’t worry, though.  When you’re there in the midst of it, you find you’re connected with kin who empathise and can help you through.  Commensurate with the depths is also a bearing for getting through it.

Lifting our heads when nothing makes any sense is a learned response, and we find that had it not been for such a challenge we’d never have known we could do it.