Having a good relationship is not
just about communicating better; it’s more about attending to the miscommunication that diminishes and
destroys meaning in relationships. Miscommunication is the biggest relational
challenge we face in this world where communication characterises the quality
of relationships.
But not only does communication
dictate the quality of our relationships, it often defines our relationships’
strength and longevity. Most divorces will be precipitated within the sharpness
or dullness of miscommunication.
Clarity is what we sorely need in redressing
such miscommunication.
Exploring How Miss Communication Can
Become Mrs Clarity
If we can agree that clarity is
the antidote to miscommunication, we can transform a negative into a positive.
We are much more likely to decrease our miscommunication when we focus
positively on improving the clarity of our communication.
If we personify miscommunication
as a novice (Miss Communication) and clarity as the more experienced person
(Mrs Clarity) we can know that our communication faults can be addressed; that
we all have hope for development toward the enhancement of our relationships
through clearer communication.
Beyond the frailties of the human
mind, which is prone to lapses and absentmindedness, there is much we can be
mindful for when it comes to communicating with marital partners, loved ones,
work colleagues, and friends.
Much miscommunication can be
addressed by taking care of the words we use, when we use them, and even by how
we communicate. Nothing substitutes a face-to-face conversation where both are
focused on the conversation, the words are kept plain and understandable, and
then agreement is reached and then reiterated. When communication is crystal
clear, clarity is achieved. Both parties are under no false allusion.
Blessed are relationships that are
rich in clarity; where trust has been nurtured and continues to grow in
multiplicity, because communication issues are averted in the planning before they
reach crisis point.
Miss Communication is the person
of inexperience, of ineptitude, and of moral lack. Such a person doesn’t have
the diligence to care so much for the relationship to make all the effort
required to circumvent misunderstanding.
Mrs Clarity, on the other hand,
has learned, both by easy and hard ways, that Miss Communication is no option
for her. She has made her metamorphosis from that state of incapable
inexperience to a more preferable state: a reliable person to be in
relationship with.
So, if we were to use marriage as
a metaphor, we might imagine Miss Communication being swept off her feet by Mr
Clarity. Such a marriage of understanding is consummated when Miss
Communication becomes Mrs Clarity.
***
Relationship success is not just
about communicating better. It’s more about reducing the amount of
miscommunication. Clarity of communication takes care and effort to check and
recheck. Clarity is the outcome where trust and respect are valued.
© 2012 S. J. Wickham.
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