“Now, discipline
always seems painful rather than pleasant at the time, but later it yields the
peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”
— Hebrews 12:11 (NRSV)
As a computer slows and locks, requiring a
restart toward faster performance, and we wither in fatigue without sleep,
necessitating a nap that facilitates alertness, so too real-life rock-bottom
experiences can mean life and hope for our futures.
But the rock-bottom experience is far from
kind. It takes us to a depth we’d not
wish on anyone. Suddenly life’s plunged
into darkness and we can begin to panic. Indeed, panic summarises our life at
this point.
It’s not until later that we see the purpose
in a time so tremulous.
***
The wisdom of God is
taking us there,
The condition and
circumstance that strips us bear,
Discipline, as such,
to show we’re loved,
Won’t happen, really, unless we’re shoved.
Desperation
facilitates an inbounding grace,
We’ve never
experienced such incredible space,
For considering God
like never before,
God we know
now — that’s for sure.
***
Sinking All the Way Down
None of us sinks all the way down willingly.
We will all struggle and strive to arrest the slide. Sometimes we do arrest
that slide, we miss the rock-bottom experience, and we save it for a later
time, putting off the inevitable. Or we might miss it and therefore miss what
God has for us, even in the midst of turmoil.
God, of course, many times has different
thoughts on the matter.
Completely opposite to our understanding,
God’s love takes us through this extreme experience; always for our good. We
say, “How could God allow this?” We don’t see the longer term plan. We don’t
see our pain paving the way toward a new
us; a raised and revived us. Suddenly our true purpose is made known through
this ‘valley of the shadow of death’ season.
Sinking all the way down, again, is not
something we will allow to happen willingly. It’s more likely to occur by way
of our removal of choice and control—the circumstances of life
bewitching us for a time, but inevitably—as it’s revealed—not bewitching us at
all.
Experiencing This Truth
Of course, we cannot agree with the
foregoing unless we have actually lived the rock-bottom experience, or someone
close to us has.
If we’ve never experienced this truth, it
may still be coming toward us like a freight train through a tunnel. It’s not a
jinx to think in these terms, for blessed is the person who is thankful for
what they haven’t been called to endure, yet is prepared — at least in theory —
for what hellish times may yet confront them. This is but another image of the
fear of the Lord.
Actually Recovering
At the place of least resistance we learn so
much more about God, and this new direction God is taking us. With time we
begin to see the goodness in it. The process taking us from that old life to
the new is clean and swift; in that way, so respectful. We see that afterwards.
Actually recovering is initially about
surrender; then it’s about perseverance; finally, it’s patience.
With this new head on our shoulders, and a
heart flexible to the meandering voice of God, we learn to navigate the choppy
waters as the winds eventually die down. A season of soul-peace is born.
What is recovery from the rock-bottom
experience — as a ‘felt’ thing — other than the normal process of grief? But
then again, is there such a thing as a ‘normal’ process of grief? It is
different for all.
What is common for all, however, is that surrender,
perseverance and patience see us through.
***
Harsh and despairing times can be the
impetus for being raised; we reach out to God in all honesty and sincerity. God
meets us there. If we choose to follow God, and we continue to, life will work
out, and much better than we could have ever hoped or dreamt for.
© 2013 S. J. Wickham.
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