THINK of anytime in the experience of life as a celebration, and there’s another side; the experience of that time for those suffering grief.
Loss has the irrevocable fact about it that it highlights what we’ve lost. We cannot escape it. Loss taunts us. It piques those things we somehow took for granted (though we never knew we did) and we see in others’ lives that which is now gone from our life.
5 things to hate about Christmas through the lens of grief:
1. Those precious Facebook and Instagram posts of family celebrating joyously — everyone happy; another ‘incredibly successful’ family event — a reminder of what we’re now missing.
2. Those days visiting packed shopping malls for gifts we don’t want to buy, including the strained interactions we have with shop-store staff, and the snarls of shoppers knowing they too are caught up in a commercialised racquet.
3. Those hours leading up to Christmas where we lay awake in bed pondering how we’ll endure the moments where we either want to weep or scream.
4. Those minutes on the day of Christmas itself, sitting at the family event wondering what on earth we’re doing, a mind on what we cannot get our minds off, or an aimless walk alone on a beach as if nobody knew we were alone or cared.
5. Those seconds where we’re lectured about how good Christmas is, and how good it would be if we understood how grateful we should be of it.
I thank God for the experiences of two consecutive lamentable Christmases. They taught me what should be obvious. Not everyone is happy at Christmas.