A husband’s heart that “makes love” to his wife

Men and women often view sex and intimacy differently.  There’s nothing revolutionary in this statement.  The truth for both husbands and wives is there’s so much more to effective and enjoyable marriage than sex.  There are so many other ways of “making love”.

Early on in our marriage, Sarah and I agreed one Christmas to “make” each other’s Christmas present.  We had about three months and an expansive budget of $10 each to produce a stunning masterpiece.  I got sneaky and decided to “interview” Sarah’s grandparents (all four were still alive then but since are all no longer so) so they could give me a short story of her life and I made an illustrated book.  I spent about $9.  Sarah also produced a book called “Love Is,” inspired by 1 Corinthians 13.

In her book, Sarah was assisting her “husband with potential” (me) to truly understand the heart behind the love a wife needs, acknowledging that the terms “heart” and “love” are absolutely pregnant with possibility.

The term “heart” is all about motivation.  It’s all about the reasons (the WHY) we do the things we do.  “Love” is action-oriented and nothing really to do with simple affection, though the heart is evidenced in love that acts passionately with conviction.

The examples Sarah gave me can seem mundane, but they demonstrate how simple and doable “making love” can be for husbands motivated to love their wives.  There is a simplicity in what a wife wants, and it’s really not that hard, but it does require a heart motivated for the right reasons.  Every action from a husband’s heart committed to making love to his wife in these ways is destined to bless her.

His heart keeps her safe, proves he is worthy of her trust and respect, and commits to being faithful as she is faithful.  He sees her as she sees him.  Simply put, he returns a commitment he made to love her, a commitment she readily fulfils from her heart.

Love is:

§  Tickles and laughter (where it’s appreciated)

§  Cooking dinner, doing the dishes, or both!

§  Helping each other out

§  Playing and spending time together

§  Hugs and kisses

§  Foot and back massages

§  Unexpected gifts

§  Sitting quietly together

Love is 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 . . .

§  Love is patient

§  Love is kind

§  Love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude

§  It does not insist on its own way

§  It is not irritable or resentful

§  It does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth

§  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things

Love most especially doesn’t:

§  Control other people or situations that affect others in any way

§  Refuse to acknowledge wrongs, apologise, and repent of wrongdoing

The heart that loves submits to a service that resembles the love of God which is a love of others. The heart that loves does so consistently well.

The heart that loves understands the role of trust and respect.

I might add that the man in my life that epitomises the best of a husband’s submission to serve his wife is my father who loved my mother for 60 years and one month.  I’m so thankful for his example and for his devotion to our precious and dear Mum.