Moods are states that seem quite mysterious and what leads to them cannot always be consciously known. But the truth is moods are so often propagated via a trigger or triggers.
If we can identify the triggers we have a better chance of controlling both our own moods and influencing for their better the moods of others.
Triggers are those things that evoke emotional responses, whether good or bad, happy, angry, sad or glad.
Our triggers were wired into us, generally through our experience of life, mostly in our childhoods. Of course, triggers have adapted and continue to adapt even today. What might have triggered a certain response a few years ago may not trigger the same response today. Similarly, we might respond to a trigger today that we weren’t even aware of six-months ago.
Getting Inside Our Own Minds and Hearts
If we do not know our own triggers and master them the best we can, how can we expect to adequately manage and facilitate others’ triggers?
Changing moods is made easier if we can at least change ours—or at least be honest with ourselves and others when we’re just allowing the mood to take us for awhile. (Some moods are just best ridden-out.)
We should never underestimate the power advanced to our own credibility for being honest with ourselves and others regarding our own moods and triggers.
Getting Inside Others’ Minds and Hearts
Some might suggest, “No, you cannot do that—get into others minds and hearts!” I’m sorry, but if you’re a parent or in any sort of supervisory role, yes you do.
Most adults are in some fashion a ‘supervisor’. It warrants the supervisor, then, to attempt to understand the makings, machinations and wirings of the people who need to be influenced in order to get ‘the job’ done.
Influence, here, is not about anything against the person. It’s always working with them and for them, especially if it is adults or teenagers we’re talking about.
The Key to Success is Motive
Whenever we’re appropriately motivated we’re set to succeed. It doesn’t always mean it will happen, but at least we’ve done all we can.
When our motive is simply to engage with people fairly and we do that, things do generally turn out for the best.
Perhaps best of all is having the preparedness of empathy for all people’s moods. To a point, we cannot predict incoming triggers and the respondent moods, so we best have an approach that can live with the status quo as it attends.
It Has to Be About Love!
To summarise and symbolise such a motive, it has to be about love.
Love is the thing that opens the door to an unthreatening awareness, and it is awareness that can then be acted upon, if the person subjected to the awareness is willing.
Awareness roams free, without recrimination, within the bounds of love.
© 2010 S. J. Wickham.