We’ve all been there. A fight between two family members leads to a fraying of edges, perhaps at the end of a long time together, and suddenly what is just a simple conflict begins to take a more sinister, insidious shape.
How is it that life is “spoiled” by these occasions? Well, for starters, we’re more emotionally piqued by close family—they know our buttons and occasionally they press them!
In all families the need of forgiveness is constant. It protects trust. Trust is vital in all familial relationships—the cornerstone of any decent relationship if we’re honest about it.
Trust is never more under threat within the family unit than in the ‘family fight.’ Not that all family members are actual protagonists, but by virtue of their mere presence oftentimes, everyone is implicated in it one way or other, actively or passively. Ever noticed that fights require sides to be taken? (Well, the implication of sides, anyway.)
Patience can be tested most in those we’ve most familiarity with. And to a certain extent we can get away with abusing some of the ones which most love us; the ones we too love without condition—and they with us too.
Forgiveness is critical in restoring trust in any haggard relationship.
It still surprises me, however, the number of people who willingly hold onto caustic grudges—not just in familial matters either. These people only hurt themselves, but they also drag others down with them, especially the ones who’re more than prepared to bury the hatchet.
The quicker, more genuine, the forgiving action in our family relationships, the more pure the love we enjoy. Period. Who in their right mind would hold back on those they truly love? Who in their right mind would hold back on themselves?
It bodes us increasingly; our families are very important to us whether we like it or not. Any discomfort to actually forgive that family member who’s “wronged” you; or vice versa, the discomfort to seek forgiveness, is so abundantly worth breaking through—every last bit.
It takes courage to forgive and be forgiven. The benefits are freedom; pure, unadulterated, majestic, joyous freedom—and freedom for one and all.
© 2010 S. J. Wickham.