Don’t be pressured when people demand that you move on

We’ve all heard people say, “Come on, you just need to get over it,” and sometimes it was for our own good.

But a lot of the time people said this simply because they had lost patience with us.  This being the case, their request that we “move on” for “our own good” was actually not motivated for our own good at all, but for theirs.  To placate their frustration.

There are all sorts of good reasons to move on.  And there are some bad ones.

Just as there are all sorts of reasons to not rush the process.  Any moving on in a rush is ultimately forlorn, so if we’re on our own side, and there’s no reason we wouldn’t be, then it pays that we would take our time in moving on.

There are all sorts of things we might want to move on from, just as there are all sorts of reasons why we would want to.  The truth is, we have far more chances of success when we, ourselves, have decided without external pressure.  Indeed, the more the external pressure we’re under, the less real and sustainable change we will exhibit.

Whenever people try to convince us of a course of action, especially if we feel coerced or manipulated, we need to be mindful for their motives.  Sometimes people do the right things for the wrong reasons, just as people can do the wrong things for the right reasons.

If someone is genuinely for us, they might know what action would be good for us, and they will support us in that action, at the right time for us, at the time we select.  They accept it is our life.

If a person is genuinely for us, they will accept that they aren’t living our life, no matter how much they think they know the challenges and opportunities before us.

Putting pressure on people to act a certain way or to do certain things may have short term impact, but it’s no way to create long term change.

There are many people, who for many different reasons, cannot simply move on.  It could be trauma or grief or a desire to hold to something treasured.

Let us value the sanctity of life that feels it must, at least for the time being, hold on.

Photo by Emma Simpson on Unsplash