“There is
only one happiness in life, to love and be loved.”
~George Sand
In order for us to be able to give
our love, we need first the capacity to receive
love: God’s love. The case for this rationale is easy to argue. A rudimentary understanding
of grace is required to both give and receive love, which are fuelled by the
loving motive.
Love is much more than an emotion;
it is more often a decision.
1. To Be Loved
We need to have experienced love—God’s love—before we
can know how to give love. Such an experience most often comes from people
exemplifying grace as it is felt within our lives. God has loved us through
them. Love has lured us in pure goodness.
Children brought up in abusive or
neglectful environments feel something is missing; that their upbringing was
wrong. They don’t need to be told there was a lack of love. Their life suffered
from a lack of love. Even in a vacuum they would have known it was wrong. And
when they are first loved, hope, meaning, and purpose begins at last to
flourish.
Humanity has the capacity to love,
because the love of God has been revealed in and through the Son. Such love,
though it is expressed imperfectly everywhere, is everywhere to be seen.
Because we are made in the image of a loving God, we have the innate desire to
connect in love. It is the purpose of our lives.
To be loved is a prerequisite for
loving. To be loved provides the motive to love.
2. To Love
Having known love—the actual
experience—there is no huge leap in desiring to reciprocate. There is an
inkling that loving provides its own reward. And it does. To love provides
instant spiritual feedback to our souls. We feel blessed.
But we cannot just love without
having first experienced the grace of God’s compassion, and to know, at first, the
veritable resplendence in forgiveness. To ward against bitterness in the
relational setting is the wisdom of love.
Having received love we have half our
happiness. It’s a transaction not yet fully satisfied. As soon as we have
experienced love we have a strong yearning to reciprocate. Having learned
quickly the power in love we feel compelled to pay it forward.
To love is the completion of joy.
This is when life makes terrific sense.
***
Having experienced love, via the
grace of God manifest within forgiving relationships, we naturally want to
reciprocate love. This is the best of life. To love and to be loved are the
keys to happiness. Love is at its best when it wants to love.
© 2012 S. J. Wickham.
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